I knocked my
boyfriend’s flat door as he invited me to come over and had a dinner together
with him tonight. He even asked me to slept over tonight with him.
“Hold on a second!” I heard a deep
voice shouted inside. I looked around of the surrounding of his flat while
waiting for him to open the door. I heard a click sound and a half-naked guy
appeared. My eyes roamed over his body that was full of tattoos. His boxer was
hung lowly around his hips and it showed his ‘v’ lines. My breath hitched at
the view and I immediately looked up and my eyes met with the green eyes. He
just stared at me blankly.
“He’s in the kitchen.” My
boyfriend’s housemate, Harry said and walked in. I followed behind him. He sat
on the sofa in the living room. I leave him alone and went to the kitchen. I
saw my boyfriend, Luke stood and looking through the cabinet while his back
facing me. I tip toed toward him and hugged him from behind him.
“Lukey !” , I said and made him
jumped slightly. He turned around and grinned at me. He hugged me and pulled me
with him to the chair and sat on it. I sat on his laps. He caressed my cheek
and kissed my forehead.
“How was your day, love?” He asked
sweetly and stared at me. I giggled and played with his hair.
“Good. I think? My other lecturer didn’t
appear to the class, so, I slept for the whole time.” I said and shrugged at
him. His head tilted to back slightly as he laughed at me. He poked my nose
with his finger and said, “That was typical of you, babe.”
“What are we going to do, today?” I asked
after for a few seconds of silence.
“I thought we’ll cook together right
now and have a dinner together.” I said cheerfully.
“Without Harry?”
“What’s the problem if Harry has a
dinner with us?” Luke looked at me confusedly. I sighed and looked to the door
of the kitchen and looked at him again.
“He is freaking weird.” I whispered
at him as if Harry could hear what I just said. Luke laughed loudly and shook
his head.
“He is a great man, you know.” He
stated and chuckled at me. I just pouted back. Luke looked at the back of me
and stopped laughing. I turned my head and there he was, a freak guy stood at
the door and he stared at both of us.
“Oh, hey Harreh.” Luke said and
smiled at him. “Do you need anything?” Harry just shook at him.
“I’ll be in my room. Just saying… If
you need anything, I’ll be there.” He mumbled. He gave a last look at me and
immediately left the kitchen. The room silent for a while until I broke it.
“I told you he is weird.” I muttered
and looked back at him. He just smiled and pushed my fringe from my forehead.
He stared at me and frowned slightly. I gave him a confuse look.
“What?” I asked.
“Harry will take care of you when
the time is come.” He mumbled. My smile faded away as he said it.
“What time? Why would he take care
of me?” He didn’t answer me as he pecked my lips.
“You’re not going to leave me,
right?” I asked timidly. He smiled.
“No… But just in case something
happen to me, I asked Harry to take care of you. I trusted him and I know he
will treat you well…” He whispered. My eyes started watery.
“No! I don’t wanna be with him. I
just want to be with you. I only loves you.. Forever.” I said and punched his
chest slightly. “Of course you’re not gonna leave me. You promised that.” I
cried and stared at him. He wiped away my tears with his thumb and leaned in to
kiss my eyes. Then, he pulled me closer and hugged me. His snuggled his head in
my neck and murmured. “I love you… I love you, Isabelle…” I just sobbed on his
shoulder. A few minutes later, he pulled away and grinned.
“Alright, enough for the sad moment.
Let’s start to make our dinner, yeah? I’m kinda hungry right now.” He pouted
and poked his stomach. I just laughed and nodded.
***************
I woke up the next day after we had
a nice dinner last night. He was being more cheeky and romantic than usual. I
smiled as I flashback the moment. I tilted my head and I was in Luke’s arm. He
was still asleep, so, I sat up slowly and looked down at him. He looks so
peaceful in his sleep.
“Lukey, wake up.” I whispered and
shook his body lightly. He didn’t respond at all. I shook his body stronger
than before but he seemed not moving at all.
“Luke? Luke, wake up.” I said louder
and my heart beat faster. I pushed his body to aside and his hand hung at the
side of the bed weakly. My eyes watery as I shook his body harshly but he
didn’t moving at all.
“Harry? Harry??!” I shouted loudly
and I immediately heard a loud bang of Luke’s room. Harry walked in
immediately.
“Isabelle?” He asked. I looked at
him and then looked at Luke again. He followed my gaze and he cursed under his
breath.
“Shit. We need to take him to the
hospital. Now.” He said and pulled Luke. He carried him in bridal style and he
left the room immediately. I nodded and followed behind him. Harry drove his
car to the hospital and Luke was immediately pushed to the emergency room.
*************
After a few minutes, I turned around
to look at Harry and he was leaning on the wall, staring the floor mindlessly.
I walked toward him and he looked up at me.
“What is wrong with him?” I asked
quietly. Harry didn’t respond as he looked away. I sighed and asked again. This
time my voice is louder. “What is wrong with him??”
“I can’t.” He mumbled. I stared at
him in disbelief.
“Harry, he is in the emergency room!
We don’t even know whether he is alive because yesterday he was so fine!” I
yelled right on his face. He closed his eyes and breathed in.
“He told me not to tell you. Sorry,
Isabelle.” He whispered as he stared at me. My tears fell as I looked away from
him. Suddenly a doctor walked out from the emergency room and both of us
approached towards him.
“How is he?” I asked hopefully. The
doctor just sighed and shook his head slightly.
“I’m sorry. He couldn’t make it
before he arrived at the hospital.” He said and left us. I sobbed out loud
without I realised at all. I walked to the side and leaned against the wall,
sliding down slowly. As I sat on the floor, I cried in my hands. I heard a
shuffling sound and Harry sat beside me.
“Can you tell me now?” I asked in my
cracked voice.
“He had a lung cancer.” He
whispered. I immediately looked up at him.
“For 2 years.” He continued as our
eyes met. My new tears streamed down my cheeks.
“He was in stage 2, so there was no
way for him to be cure and the doctor said that he had a year to live. It was a
miracle he could stay for 2 years.” He frowned and looked up.
“He didn’t tell you because he didn’t
want you to get worried about him. All he wanted to see for the rest of his short life was your
smile.” I suddenly felt angry toward him. Toward Luke. I laughed humourlessly
at Harry.
“And he thought once he died, I’m
gonna happy for it? I’m gonna celebrating over his death??” I asked and stared
at Harry.
“Isa-“
“He is selfish! You are selfish! You
should have told me!” I cut his sentence.
“He told me to take care of you the
day he leave you. The day he leave both of us.” He muttered and pushed his hair
to the back. Oh, that’s what was Luke talking about yesterday. I should have
knew it. I was so stupid to not realise it at all.
“You don’t need to. I can take care
of myself.” I said and looked at him. He stared sadly at me.
“Isabelle, I-“ I cut his sentence
again but this time I slapped him right on his left cheek. He looked down and
sighed as if it was nothing for him.
“Don’t ‘Isabelle’ me! How could you
guys never tell me all of this? You think its okay for not telling me about
this important thing? He thought it’s alright if he suddenly left me alone in
this world?! No! Of course not! You guys just being selfish.. You..” I couldn’t
say anything anymore as I sobbed loudly and covered my face with my hand. I
whined loudly in my cry as I knew Luke won’t be back at all. I felt a pair of
hands pulled me and I was in between Harry’s legs. He pulled me closer and
embraced me tightly. His hand rubbed my back soothingly as he whispered in my
ear .
“It’s alright.. You’re not alone.. I’m here for you..” I just
cried louder and fist his black shirt.
“I love him so much..” I whispered it repeatedly. And Harry
just whispered “I know..” in my ear.
********
After the funeral, everyone had left
the ceremony including Luke’s family and my family too. I stared at the
tombstone blankly. All of our memories played in my mind and without I realised
my tears fell again. I didn’t mind to wipe it away as I knew there gonna be a
new tears replacing it.
Hours later, I heard a sound of
steps behind me as someone held my shoulder. I ignored it as I knew who it was.
Harry just stood behind me and stared at me for those hours. Why did he being
so dumb? If I was him I would leave myself alone at this damn ceremony.
“Let’s go, Isabelle.” He whispered
and pulled me beside him slowly. I sobbed and nodded as I followed him. I turn
my head and had a last look of Luke’s grave and continued our way to Harry’s
car. He opened the passenger door for me before he ran to the driver door and
went in. He drove his car immediately leaving the ceremony.
********
2 years
later…
“You may dismiss. Do not forget to
attend your assignment next week.” My Professor said and straight away left the
hall. I closed my books and started to pack all my things.
“Hey, Isabelle.” I heard someone
behind me. I turned my head and it was my project partner, Sara.
“Yes?” I said and smiled at her. I’ve
done packing, so, now we were on our way to walk out from the hall.
“I was wondering, would you like to
go to the library with me? We can finish up our assignment at there.” She asked
and smiled at me. I nodded at her and grinned back.
“It’s a good idea-“
“Isabelle!” I heard someone called
my name. My head immediately turned and there Harry was, leaned against the
wall in his office clothed. I frowned slightly and looked at Sara.
“I’m sorry. Can we maybe do it by
tomorrow?” I gave her an apologized look.
“It’s alright. I understand.. It’s
really hard to have an older boyfriend.” She said and teased me. I rolled my
eyes.
“He’s not my boyfriend.” I said it
to her for thousands times. She just laughed and left me alone. What the… Harry
approached at me and tapped my shoulder. I slowly turned around and faced him.
He just looked at me emotionlessly.
“Ready?” He asked.
“Why are you even here?” I asked
annoyed at him. He gave me that ‘are-you-kidding-me’ look.
“Have a lunch with you. As usual.”
He said as he followed behind me while I walked away from him. I felt he tucked
my bag, so I let it fall and he took it and slung it over his shoulder.
“You don’t have to do all of this.”
I said as we jumped in his car. He put my bag at the backseat and turn on his
car.
“Do what? Your bag not really that
heavy for me to carry.” He asked dumbly. I sighed and stared outside of the
window.
“You don’t have to look after of me.
I’m okay now.” I mumbled. He looked at me for a while but then he looked on the
road again.
“I can’t. That’s what Luke’s want
from me. To take care of you.” He said calmly. I turned my body slightly to
face him.
“You can’t do this forever. Everyone
think that we are in a relationship, but, you’re not in love with me at all.
You just care about me because of that damn of Luke’s order.” I said at him. He
just kept silent and I sighed.
“I never told you that I’m not in
love with you.” He broke the silence.
“Do you?” He didn’t answer. I stared
at him in disbelief.
“Since when?” I whispered.
“First time I met you.” I looked at
him and he was blushing.
+++++
“Oops!”
I said as I bumped on someone. I looked up and a green eyes stared down at me.
I gulped as he looks really scary. I immediately stepped back to have a
distance from him.
“Hi.”
He mumbled. My mouth opened to greet him back but there was no sound out from
my mouth, so I closed it back.
“Isabelle!”
I heard Luke called me and I turned my head. He ran toward me and stood beside
me. We were only friends by this time. He looked between me and that creepy
guy.
“Who
is this?” He asked. I just shrugged at him and stared at the guy. Luke looked
confused but just ignored it and grinned at me.
“Well,
let’s go. I really need to find a room to rent. It’s really hard to be a
university student and you are lucky to be still in a high school.” Luke
rambled as he pulled me away from the creepy guy. I looked at the guy as he
stared at me but I looked away and stared at Luke.I heard someone fake his
cough and both of us stopped walking.
“Did
you say that you need a room for rent?” That creepy guy asked. Luke smiled at
him and nodded.
“Yeah.”
“You
see, I rent a room at the flat.. I kind of alone, so, if you don’t mind.. We
can share?” He asked and smiled. I looked at Luke as he grinned.
“Sure!
That’s great.” Luke said happily.
“Luke!”
I warned him as we don’t even know who is he. And yet he agreed to stay with
that guy. Geez. Luke smiled at me and assured me by saying it was okay. I just
rolled my eyes.
“By
the way… I’m Harry.” That creepy, I mean, Harry said.
“Oh.
I’m Luke and this is my friend, Isabelle.” Luke introduced us.
“Isabelle.”
He repeated and stared at me blankly. I just gave him a confuse look.
++++++++++
After that damn awkward confession
from Harry, we had a lunch at a café in silence. After we finished, we went to
his car again.
“Let’s just go back to your flat.” I
muttered.
“Why?”
“I just remembered I left something
in Luke’s room. I want to take it now.” I lied to him. I just missed Luke and I
just wanna lied down on his bed and remember all of our moments.
“I thought you had took everything
and his room is empty now.” Harry said as he drove his car. I just stared down
on my laps.
“Fine..” He sighed and the whole
ride was in silent.
After we arrived at the flat, I
immediately opened Luke’s room door and walked in. I heard Harry went to his
room and closed his door. I did the same thing and closed the door too. I
looked around of the room as it is almost empty except for the bed, closet and
a nightstand table was there. I walked to the bed and threw myself on it. I
stared blankly at the fan. My mind roamed around as I remember our sweet
moments while we were together. But out of nowhere Harry’s face popped in my
mind. I cursed and immediately sat up to wash away that face in my mind. “Why
is he even disturbed my brain too?” I muttered and rolled my eyes. My gaze fell
to the nightstand table and there was a paper slipped underneath it. I looked
at it curiously and crawled toward it. I pulled out the paper and it was
actually a letter. It was a familiar handwriting of Luke and there was ‘To my Isabelle…’ written on the front.
I opened it andit was a long letter of
him. I started to read it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Isabelle,
By the time you found this paper, I
might not in this world anymore. I know it’s such a ridiculous of me by not
telling to you about this important thing. The doctor said I only had a year to
live and you don’t know how it felt to know that I had such a short life to
spend my life with you. To see your laugh and smile. All this time I tried hard
to get you to be mine and I end up gonna die this so soon. But, it’s alright,
God gave me another year to be with you. For me to done a lots of things for
you. To let me able to see you to graduate in your high school. I will always
remember that big smile during that graduate day. I was thankful for Him to let
me see your happiness smile.
I know that I won’t get worry too
much when I died as Harry is there for you. He is always there for you. I
promise. I knew there is ‘love connection’ between both of you for the first time we met him. Do you
remember that one night? You spend your day at our flat and watched movie
together? Bet you’re not remember as I know you really got a short memory.
Hahaha. Well, I said that I’m gonna had a nap and back to my room. But, as I
returned to the living room, I saw something that made me jealous, you and him
was cuddling. Geez. You even gave him a nickname (Hazza) when you guys just a friend.
And you only gave me a nickname right
after we’re together. Don’t you see how special Harry was for you, Isabelle?
From that day I decided to make you
stay away from him. I even always make sure he is not in the flat whenever I
asked you to come over. And it happened, you started not to talk with him and
you are mine now.
A year later, I got diagnosed of a
lung cancer. Maybe this is a karma for me by making you guys apart. I know,
after I died, Harry will take care of you. I know it’s hard to forget me but
please, accept him and learn to love him, Isabelle. He actually ever admitted
to me that he loves you. He does love you before I did. He just didn’t dare to
say it because he thought you won’t in love with a tattoo guy. Well, you even
called him a freak guy for several times. I know there is inside you, your bits
of love to him is still in your heart. All you need to do is open your heart
and let him in. Let he love you. He could be better than me. I’m sorry,
Isabelle. Love u..
Your
Lukey.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
By the time I finished reading it,
the room is full with the sound of me sobbing. Harry and I used to be that
close? I gave him a nickname? Hazza? Why I can’t remember those things? Damn
this short memory stupid brain. I tried to flashback any of the moment of Harry
and I but it seems won’t appear in my head. I read again Luke’s letter about us
cuddling.
*********
I
knock the door and it finally open and revealed Harry with his messy curly
hair. I grinned as he smirked back at me.
“Hazza!”
I yelled and hugged him. He made an ‘oof!’ sound as I hugged him tightly. Then,
he hugged me back and just chuckled.
“Hey,Belle.”
He mumbled and pulled away. I grinned and walked inside. He closed the door and
followed behind me.
“Luke?”
I called and heard him shouted from the living room. I walked toward it and
there he was, sitting on the sofa while eating popcorn and watched movie.
“What
are you watching?” I asked as I lied on another sofa. He just shrugged and
Harry took a seat beside Luke. I pouted as I was really wanted him to sit
beside me. But, again, I took the whole sofa for myself.
“Just
some damn movie.” Luke muttered and shoved a handful of popcorn in his mouth. I
just shook at his behavior and stared on the tv. After a few minutes, Luke
yawned and he immediately stood up.
“I’m
gonna had a nap in my room.” He mumbled and scratched his tummy. Both of us
just nodded while still staring on the tv. He walked away and then I heard his
room door shut. I looked at Harry through the conner of my eyes and he was just
staring blankly on the tv. I noticed he looked at me and I immediately looked
away from him. After he looked back on the tv, I stared at him again. And this
thing continued for a few minutes until he got fed up and sighed.
“What
do you want, Belle?” He asked quietly. I grinned and sat up on the sofa.
“Can
we cuddle?” I asked immediately.
“No.”
He straight away answered it. Well, that’s hurt.
“Why?”
“No.”
“Cuddle?”
“No…”
“Please?”
I asked and pouted at him. He rolled his eyes and looked at me. His breath
hitched as he saw my expressions. He got blushed and looked away for a while.
“Okay,
fine.” He whispered but enough for me to hear it. I jumped toward him and sat
beside him. I grabbed his arms and put it around my shoulder and I put my head
on his chest. I could heard the beat of his heart. I sighed happily and smiled.
“You’re
so warm, Hazza.” I said and laughed.
“I’m
not Olaf.” He blurted out.
“What?”
I asked and looked up.
“No.
Nothing.” But then my head get what did he means and I laughed out loud.
“You
watched Frozen?!” I asked in between my laughed. He got blushed more and more.
“Oh
my God, a tattoo guy watched Frozen.” I stated it and laughed again.
“Shut
up.” He groaned and covered his face with his hands.
***********
I smiled a little at those memories.
Now I realised after that day, I never really met him as he was always not in
the flat whenever I came over. It was sure Luke’s planned to get us apart from
each other. I fold up the letter and
walked out from the room. I walked slowly to Harry’s room and knocked it.
“Come in.” I heard that deep voice
of him and I turned the knob slowly. I opened it slightly and popped my head
inside. I saw he was shirtless and sat on his bed with his paper works all over
the bed. He looked up and frowned slightly as he saw my puffy eyes and red
nose.
“Isabelle? What’s wrong?” He asked
and put aside his file in his hand. I opened the door widely and another tears
streamed down my face.
“H-Hazza..” I whimpered and wiped my
tears away. I could see that he froze as he heard I called him by a nickname.
He stood up and walked toward me.
“Belle?” He called me again but this
time by my nickname he gave. I hugged him immediately and he stepped back to
balance our body, He slowly put his hands around me and rubbed my back. He
carried me and walked to the bed , he sat on the bed as I was on his laps.
“What is it, Belle?” He whispered
and wiped away my tears. I just showed him the letter and he took it
confusedly. He opened and read it. After he read it, he put it down and stared
at me. I stared back at him.
“Really? Did you really love me?” I
asked. He chuckled and looked at me amusedly.
“That question should be for you.”
He said and smirked at me. I got blushed and looked down on my laps. I felt he
held my chin and tilted my face to look at him.
“Do you?” He whispered and his eyes
showed some hope that I’m gonna say yes.
“Yes.. I think.. I mean, I did love
you before…” I muttered and smiled at him. He smiled back at me.
“Well, I love you, before and now..”
He whispered and both of us stared into our eyes. He leaned in slowly and I closed
my eyes. I felt his lips on my lips. He kissed me softly and moved his lips.
His hand when to the back of my head and pulled me closer as if to ask me to
kiss him back. So, I did and I moved my lips with him. He bite softly my bottom
lips and I moaned without I realised it at all. He chuckled and pulled away.
He stared down at me with his now
dark green eyes. He leaned again but this time he kissed my jaw and moved lower
and lower to my neck. He trailed his lips at the side of my neck which is
sensitive and I couldn’t hold my moan.
“H-Hazza…” I moaned as my hands
roamed around his shirtless body. He pulled away and both of us panted as if we
just ran for thousands miles. He pushed away all of his files and paper works
on the bed to aside and it fell to the floor. He pushed me slowly and let me
lied on the bed. He crawled over and he was straddling my body, both of his
legs at the both side of me. He leaned down and kissed me passionately. His
left hand moved underneath my shirt as his right hand tried to balance himself
so he wouldn’t out his weight on top of my body. His hand roamed on my skin and
tickled me but in the same time it comfort me. I copied his action as I roamed
my hand on his back. He broke our kiss and stared at me. His eyes showed lust
and love.
“Are you sure?” He asked huskily. I
nodded.
“Yes, please, Hazza..” I whispered
and he leaned down again. Right now I knew that I was in love with him. For all
this 2 years, I was in love with him. And maybe Lukey was right. I still had a
bits of love for him.
************
I heard an alarm beeping. So, I
opened my eyes slowly. I looked around and I was not in my room. I think for a
while, then I remembered that I had made love with Harry and slept over with
him. I smiled as I looked down on my body and Harry’s arms were around me. I
looked up and Harry was asleep with his lips apart slightly. I sat up and shook
his body.
“Hazza..” I shook harshly but he
didn’t respond to me at all. I started to panic of the memory of the day Luke’s
died and he didn’t respond to me at all that day.
“Hazza! Hazza!” I yelled and I
started to cry. “Hazza, don’t leave me, too!” I whimpered and shook his body
again.
“Harry!!” I shouted.
“My goodness.. Don’t fucking shout.”
I heard he mumbled and shifted in his sleep. I stopped crying and stared down
at him.
“Hazza?” I called. He groaned and
sat up. Rubbed his eyes lazily.
“What- Are you crying?” He asked after he completely opened his eyes. His face
showed that he panicked as soon he saw my crying. I sobbed as I felt myself so
dumb that I thought he was dead. He pulled my on his laps and I was straddling
him. He wiped my tears.
“Tell me… Was it hurt? Did I was too
rough last night?” He whispered and pushed my fringe from my eyes. I got
blushed and immediately shook my head.
“Then, what is it?” He asked softly
and kissed my lips slightly.
“I.. I thought you were dead..” I
whispered. He just stared.
“I shook your body and you didn’t
respond at all and it reminds me of Luke..” I said in a crack voice. He shushed
me and hugged me. He kissed my forehead.
“Shh…Silly you. It’s fine.. I won’t
leave. I’ll never leave you.You know that... I love you, Belle..” He whispered
in my ear and I just nodded.
“I love you too…” I whispered back. “forever..”
And he hugged me tighter while humming a song to relax me.
